Those of you that know me, (I hope) know me as a happy person. Most of the time that you see me, I’m in a cheerful mood. The reason for this is because I’ve never been in darkness. I’ve never been at a point in my life where nothing has been going right, I didn’t have anyone around me to support and love me or I’ve felt like nothing left to live for. Whenever my friends have talked about being depressed, I can’t offer advice because I’ve never been there. I’ve always enjoyed life, and couldn’t even begin to imagine wanting to end it. I know that I haven’t had the many major horrible things happen in my life, at least not as much as some people, but even if all of my family deserted me, I would still have God.
Lately I’ve been in a very dry spot spiritually, and it’s been a good few years. And because of that I can feel myself retreating into in myself, especially on Sunday’s and Wednesday nights. I can easily say that I could remain silent throughout the entire service and be ok with that. I feel like I’m getting to the place where I was a few years ago, an introvert, little homeschooler that didn’t want to do anything bold. I want to get into a good Bible reading habit, a healthy prayer life, and to be able to hear God’s voice in any situation. Once of my problems is that I don’t know how to get to that place. I need a spiritual leadership in my life. Of course from my husband whenever I get married, but right now I need a female that I can look to for guidance and direction for things in my life that I’m going through as a woman of God.
All that to say, even though I’m a joyful person that’s never experienced darkness, I’m starting to feel a shadow come over my life, and I don’t like it! So if you could be praying for me I’d really appreciated it!
~Dana
